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  • milkey garlingfatt

    18 déc. 2006, 18h21m

    Among the sickly garbage heap that is american pop culture, Mike Garlington is a glimmering beacon of hope. A charmer of both the ladies and the gentlemen, Mike also is a prolific drunk. His fine art photographs of inbreds and toothless carnies are favorites among decedent rich snobs all over the world. Mike's punky, folky music is full of the spontanious energy and blatant plagarism popular with the youth of today. Let's salute this brilliant young man and give him the millions of dollars he so greatly deserves.
  • the Mishap Crew!

    18 déc. 2006, 18h18m

    This is not a band. This is a community geared towards inducing, by means of hypnosis, subversive actions. Not since Elvis Presley's "Million Dollar Quartet" which brought together Sun Records superstars, Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins and Jerry Lee Lewis has there been an artistic collaboration of this magnitude. The Mishap Crew features musical luminaries such as Jonas Ted Bond of the legendary punk bands Craig's Brother and General Handywork as well as the Beebe brothers, Adam and Ryan, who's groundbreaking pop duo, Pope John Paul The Third is adored by millions of Japanese women. Also featuring crap-core giants, Larry Luna, Skinny D, German Cars vs American Homes' James Call, Josha Brazill (of the Future Funk Entertainment Project), Chris "phillipino" Parisi and a cornucopia of others. These enigmatic minds form a singular entity like Voltron to create a type of music previously only heard by the gods.
  • terms...

    18 déc. 2006, 18h13m

    Crap-core: Even more than Butt Rock, crap core epitomizes the desire to let it all hang out, to truly rock out with your cock out, even if your cock is repulsive and upsetting to look at. In this genre, guitarists play with their guitars hung low not because they're trying to get laid but because they can't figure out how to use their guitar straps. Crap core is like eating a raw steak with a few whole cloves of garlic on top for seasoning. If Genghis Khan was a musician, he'd be the spiritual leader of crap core.

    Core-core: Core-core takes the genre aspect of genre and focuses in on it like a laser. There is no room for deviation in core core. Notes are to be quantized and musicians who can't immediately analyze the
    concepts involved in a piece of core core music have to leave the room in shame. A core core fan hearing a fan of another genre describe their fandom laughs at them as a heart surgeon laughs at children saying they want to be a doctor when they grow up. A typical core core band consists of either a supercomputer or Latin America's greatest percussionists meeting with the Berlin Philharmonic to play the same 4 bars for 16 hours. It is for intellectuals so smart that they literally can't grow hair and need glasses with 3 lenses. oh man. The best example of core-core of all time is definitely the Spheres. Also, the Earth from Space and the mundanes aint bad. Some early James Call would also fit in the category of core-core.

    Far-Out: Far Out is God's gift to man, a sort of musical second coming that will wipe from the Earth all previous pop concepts, if used properly. It combines the severe abandon of crap-core with the technical precision of core-core to create work than come only come from Stevie Wonder producing a Johnny Rotten album. Far Out is still evolving, but one thing should be clear: it is the antithesis of 'indy rock.' Though indepedently produced by struggling musicians, a true Far Out rocker would happily enslave all indy rockers and sell them to Sean Combs in exchange for a nice compressor and pre-amp. Far Out seeks to scorch the already dry earth of pop music in order to build anew.


    "Freak-out music" is a term picked up from Jimi Hendrix who described his band saying something like "we play soul and freak-out music." It refers to a kind of psychedellic "weirdness" - the kind of music you listen to at a "freak out." ...a atonal otherworldlyness or strange spontanious mash of noise confined somehow into a pop music structure. People like Frank Zappa are also often refered to as freak out music (by other people - not just us)

    avant-unlistenable / avant-unhappy - these are basically the "idiot art" version of "experimental" music styles (musique concrete, tone poems, tape collage etc). differs from avant garde jazz or avant garde classical music in that it isn't intellectual or quite as pretentious and doesn't require a master's degree be taken seriously. these genres also often embrace pure obnoxiousness or an aesthetic of painful misery, gleefully asaulting the listening audience in a way that other "difficult" music / noise might not. John Zorn and Thurston Moore have deffinately made some "music" that would fall into these categories.

    alternashit just refers to a more crap-core version of "alternative" / "indie rock" music. basically contempoary pop-rock but with hopefully more soul and more fun.
  • missing teens manifesto

    19 oct. 2006, 19h21m

    Comrades:

    Haven't you toiled under the oppressive regime of the "Indy Rockers" long enough?

    Tired of your guitar being played in a lackadaisical and aloof manner? Drums that sound like they're being played through a sock covering a tin can? Trios or quartets of attractive, thin men with stilted attempts at a lazy man's wardrobe?

    Suffer no longer. This November, voters are kicking the Republicans out in favor of the Democrats, and this November, listeners everywhere are saying "enough!" and leading the charge as the Far Out rise up, and ENSLAVE THE INDY ROCKERS.

    You can either participate in the birth pangs of this glorious new era, or you can be swept into the dustbin of history. If you choose the former course, then start getting PUMPED for NOVEMBER 11th, when the Missing Teens play again at the Underscore.

    So raise your cell phones high! Put down your cocktails and give YOURSELVES a round of applause! Call all your friends and make sure they're safe from the new regime... a regime that is going to ROCK YOU!

    More details coming soon.

    Cheers,
    Funky Nelson Rockefeller IV

    http://themissingteens.com
  • discussion of terms

    7 sept. 2006, 2h53m

    Crap-core: Even more than Butt Rock, crap core epitomizes the desire to let it all hang out, to truly rock out with your cock out, even if your cock is repulsive and upsetting to look at. In this genre, guitarists play with their guitars hung low not because they're trying to get laid but because they can't figure out how to use their guitar straps. Crap core is like eating a raw steak with a few whole cloves of garlic on top for seasoning. If Genghis Khan was a musician, he'd be the spiritual leader of crap core.

    Core-core: Core-core takes the genre aspect of genre and focuses in on it like a laser. There is no room for deviation in core core. Notes are to be quantized and musicians who can't immediately analyze the
    concepts involved in a piece of core core music have to leave the room in shame. A core core fan hearing a fan of another genre describe their fandom laughs at them as a heart surgeon laughs at children saying they want to be a doctor when they grow up. A typical core core band consists of either a supercomputer or Latin America's greatest percussionists meeting with the Berlin Philharmonic to play the same 4 bars for 16 hours. It is for intellectuals so smart that they literally can't grow hair and need glasses with 3 lenses. oh man. The best example of core-core of all time is definitely the Spheres. Also, the Earth from Space and the mundanes aint bad. Some early James Call would also fit in the category of core-core.

    Far-Out: Far Out is God's gift to man, a sort of musical second coming that will wipe from the Earth all previous pop concepts, if used properly. It combines the severe abandon of crap-core with the technical precision of core-core to create work than come only come from Stevie Wonder producing a Johnny Rotten album. Far Out is still evolving, but one thing should be clear: it is the antithesis of 'indy rock.' Though indepedently produced by struggling musicians, a true Far Out rocker would happily enslave all indy rockers and sell them to Sean Combs in exchange for a nice compressor and pre-amp. Far Out seeks to scorch the already dry earth of pop music in order to build anew.

    "Freak-out music" is a term we picked up from Jimi Hendrix who described his band saying something like "we play soul and freak-out music." It refers to a kind of psychadellic "weirdness" - the kind of music you listen to at a "freak out." ...a atonal otherworldlyness or strange spontanious mash of noise confined somehow into a pop music structure. People like Frank Zappa are also often refered to as freak out music (by other people - not just us)

    avant-unlistenable / avant-unhappy - these are basically the "idiot art" version of "experimental" music styles (musique concrete, tone poems, tape collage etc). differs from avant garde jazz or avant garde classical music in that it isn't intellectual or quite as pretentious and doesn't require a master's degree be taken seriously. these genres also often embrace pure obnoxiousness or an aesthetic of painful misery, gleefully asaulting the listening audience in a way that other "difficult" music / noise might not. John Zorn and Thurston Moore have deffinately made some "music" that would fall into these categories.

    alternashit just refers to a more crap-core version of "alternative" / "indie rock" music. basically contempoary pop-rock but with hopefully more soul and more fun.
  • ugly!

    6 sept. 2006, 20h54m

    General Handywork is the crowning achievement of western civilization. Ever since man descovered punk rock, these obnoxious troubadors have been spreading their message of love, justice and togetherness, as well as spitting on and throwing shit at people. word up.



    we're general handywork. we're pissed off all the time. fuck you! Punk rock, VD and General Handywork: What more could a girl ask for? Featuring the vocal stylings of Jonas Ted Bond (of Craig's Borther) as well as the musical luminaries, Adam R Beebe (of the infamous crap-core duo, Pope John Paul the Third) and the Future Funk Entertainment Project's own Josha Brazil!!!
  • booze!

    6 sept. 2006, 20h49m

    Damian Lanahan-Kalish is a traitior to his class. Although the proud owner of thirty purebread pony corpses as well as a prestigiously hyphenated surname, he chooses to associate with drunks, "artists" and other degenerates rather than his fellows at the country club. Among the perverts he's been known to collaborate with are some of the most infamous smut peddlers and "rock musicians" plauging our communities today: James "the Real James" Call, Adam and Ryan Beebe, German Cars Vs. American Homes, Mike Garlington, endorphin and other truly horrible people. Often found reciting lecherous verse to beatniks accompanied by raucous jungle music, this individual is a discrace to his Blood, his Name and to the Royal House of Windsor.
  • vomit on yourself.

    6 sept. 2006, 20h44m

    as a child, i began collecting sounds and using them to construct musique concrete noise montages. if i had a masters degree in fine art, these sound montages and repeditive ambient electonic works, which are viewed as completely unlistenable by most, would be considered fine art/classical music. alas, i am but a mere college dropout/pop musician. i am also in a crap-core duo with my brother called pope john paul the third. we play freak-out music and happy pop tunes. enjoy.
  • Pope John Paul III!

    12 avr. 2006, 21h41m

    Pope John Paul III are two brothers named Adam and Ryan Beebe. They have been recording their innovative brand of music on some of the world's worst recording equipment since they were children. On their debut album, they showcase their unsettlingly varied musical styles that have won them international fame among the world's most sophisticated drunks and degenerates. Originally from Santa Cruz, California, Pope John Paul the Third now exist everywhere simultaniously.



    Two Brothers with their eyes on the world. The Beebe brothers' wirlwind musical career has included involvment with Pope John Paul the Third, The Mundanes, James Call, General Handywork, Jonas Ted Bond and Mike Garlington as well as being the owners of the influential Venereal Studios. These prolific drunkards have left their unmistakable musical stench on each and every project they've involved themselves with and every song they've produced. Girls: these are the lads you want to father your hordes of drooling slave children. Act now. Join the revolution. Be an individual. Do as we say.
  • Adam and Ryan Beebe are not your friends.

    22 mars 2006, 0h08m

    Pope John Paul III are two brothers named Adam and Ryan Beebe. They have been recording their innovative brand of music on some of the world's worst recording equipment since they were children. On their debut album, they showcase their unsettlingly varied musical styles that have won them international fame among the world's most sophisticated drunks and degenerates. Originally from Santa Cruz, California, Pope John Paul the Third now exist everywhere simultaniously.